Bi Nottingham

Info for bi / queer / bisexual / bi-curious / bi-by-some-definition people in Nottingham, England, UK

Category: BiTalkia

Post-BiTalkia survey

by unchartedworlds

The first BiTalkia duly took place! 23 of us turned up to the Friends’ Meeting House on 23 Feb 2015, for discussion, informal chat, tea & coffee.

We’re now collecting feedback from people who were there. Ideally, we’d like to get at least a few words from each of those 23 people.

The survey link

From initial soundings, it seems quite likely that we will do it a bit differently next time, so it’s definitely worth putting in your 2p. Thanks in advance for whatever clues you can give us!

BiTalkia, Monday 23 Feb 2015: details

by unchartedworlds

Date

Monday 23 February 2015.

Start time

Doors open 7pm, discussion 7.30 till 8.30, chatting time afterwards. Then washing-up-cups, and out of the room by 10pm.

Theme

“Fitting & misfitting in the bi community”.

Format

The hour of discussion will be fairly highly structured, for equal shares of talking time. Mostly in small groups. Couple of go-rounds in big group, where everyone gets a turn but doesn’t have to speak if they don’t want to. Little bit of writing; if you like, you can ask in advance for a scribe to do your writing-down, and we might be able to find a friendly volunteer.

More info below about the theme and the format.

The chatting time afterwards won’t be formally structured.

Venue

Friends’ Meeting House (FMH), 25 Clarendon Street, Nottingham NG1 5JD.

This is round the corner from the Women’s Centre. It’s a beautiful modern building with flat/ramped access and a wheelchair-accessible toilet.

We’ve booked the Social Room. That has pretty good acoustics for talking, and includes a small kitchen. Its max capacity is 60, but I think it’ll feel fine with the 15 to 25 or so participants we can probably expect.

Cost

“Pay the amount that seems right to you”. For more background on this, see below.

Travel info

See the Friends Meeting House “Finding us” page for lots of useful info on roads, parking and public transport.

Optional pre-meet

Optional:  Leaving Central Library at 7pm to walk up to the FMH together.  Hannah will be there to welcome people and lead the way.

This pre-meet is designed for people who don’t want to arrive alone via the quieter streets near the FMH after dark – or who know the library as a familiar landmark, or who just like the idea of having company on the way – and who can walk or wheel for about 500 metres.  Feel free to come straight to the FMH if that works better for you.

Depending on your travel situation, an extra possibility might be to come to the Central Library a bit earlier and have a browse round. If you’ve brought a snack, you can eat it in the food-and-chat-allowed area on floor 2.

Meet outside the library doors at 7pm. (The library shuts at 7pm.)

The Central Library is on Angel Row, just off the Old Market Square in Nottingham City Centre. Nearest tram stop: Old Market Square.

Access note:  If you want to take advantage of the communal walk, but it would take you longer than about 15 minutes to travel that far under your own steam, let me know, and we can probably organise a bonus earlier slower walk-up-together.

Open to

Bi people and anyone with a positive interest in bisexuality, including friends or partners.

(Not sure if you’re bi?  Take a look at the Bisexual Index’s quiz.)

Theme blurb for “Fitting and misfitting in the bi community”

Ever been dissatisfied with the words “bi” and “bisexual” because they don’t quite fit for you? Or ever wondered whether you’d be welcome at bi events? Ever looked around a bi group and felt “odd one out”, unfashionable or not quite at home? Ever questioned where you fit in the community (including for instance as the non-bi partner of a bi person, or as someone wondering whether they might be bi)? Ever felt like you’re “not a proper bisexual”, or “not bi enough”? Or, on the other hand, ever thought how much you like it here, even though you’re not bi?

Facilitator for this discussion

Jennifer. (me!)

I first invented the “Fitting & misfitting” format in 2002, I’ve run it a few times since then and so have other people.

Totally not necessary in order to enjoy the evening, but if you’re interested, you can read about its history here:
http://www.uncharted-worlds.org/bi/fitmisfit.htm
http://www.uncharted-worlds.org/bi/BiCon/fitmisfit2005.htm

Co-facilitator

Ideally, I’d like to collaborate with someone else who wants to be on a learning curve towards leading similar things. No previous experience required. Talk to me if you fancy it.

Other help required
  • two or more currently-ablebodied people to turn up no later than 7.10pm to help set out the room. This mainly just means moving chairs and maybe tables. Good opportunity for people who find it easier to settle in when they’re being collaboratively helpful 🙂
  • two or three people to wash up cups at the end. Hannah is bringing tea & coffee supplies.
Other contributions possible

Optionally, bring cakes / snacks! as long as they come with a piece of paper listing the ingredients.

Background on money

We want to cover the costs of hiring the room, the tea and the coffee.

We decided not to set a specific price, because it’s so hard to make that fair, given that some people can easily spend £10 without noticing and others are carefully managing pennies. Instead, we’ll have anonymous contributions to some kind of box or hat.

To give a sense of roughly how we expect the money to work: The room is £37.50 (subsidised by the FMH hire rates because BiTalkia is non-profit). In the survey, we asked people “Per meeting, an amount I would feel was an amazing bargain for such a rare & useful event is: ….”. Most people replied something like £2, £3 or £5. Then we asked “Per meeting, an amount I could stretch to if needed without feeling bad about it, to make things work well for the event as a whole, is: ….”. Most people replied around £5 to £15, a few either higher or lower. This gave us confidence to go ahead and book the room. So if there are one or two people who can’t even stretch to £2, we’ll probably still be OK. In other words, do chip in, and don’t miss it due to worrying about the money!

Update 6 Feb: added money info, which I’d forgotten before!

BiTalkia is go!

by unchartedworlds

I am thrilled to announce that we now have our first date for BiTalkia!

Evening of Monday 23 February 2015, at the Friends’ Meeting House (FMH), with an optional pre-meet leaving the Central Library at 7pm to walk up together.

The pre-meet at the library is primarily to address an access concern raised by someone in the survey: not wanting to arrive alone via the quieter streets near the FMH after dark. The Central Library’s probably more familiar as a landmark for more people, as well. Obviously this solution will only work for people who can walk or wheel for about 500 metres, so let me know if something else would work better for you.

The FMH is at 25 Clarendon Street, Nottingham NG1 5JD, round the corner from the Women’s Centre. It’s a beautiful modern building with flat/ramped access and a wheelchair-accessible toilet. There’s some metered parking on nearby streets, which is free with a Blue Badge. We’ve booked the Social Room, which has good acoustics and a small kitchen.

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My apologies to the five people who told us they couldn’t do this date! It turned out that every single date we asked about, five, six, seven or eight people said they couldn’t make it, and this one came out best overall. (good for 14 people, “Yes, but other dates better” for 2 more.)

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Further details
in a while, inc more on access and more on who the event is aimed for. I might also post at some point about what else the survey told us and why we’ve made the choices we did.

Last call for survey on plans for BiTalkia discussion group

by unchartedworlds

We’ve now had 23 replies to the anonymous survey about setting up a new bi discussion group in Nottingham! Nine people so far have said they are “keen”, and another 11 have said “maybe” (the other three just wanted to enthuse and wish us luck 🙂 )

If you’re reading this on a non-bi list and wondering “am I bi enough to take part”, the answer is probably yes 🙂 See the Bisexual Index’s excellent “Am I bisexual?” quiz.

My intention is to close the survey on Monday or Tuesday this week and go on to the next steps. The timescale we’ve got in mind is for the first BiTalkia evening to happen in Jan or Feb 2015, and I’m hoping we’ll be ready to announce its date/time/venue/theme before the next edition of QB magazine (copy date 28 Dec), which has Nottingham’s LGBTQ news.

So if you were meaning to put in your 2p and haven’t yet, now is the time.

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/JBYW3LS

If you don’t fill in the survey, you can still come to the events – it’s just really helpful for us to gather a sense of best dates, preferred venues, access limitations etc. So thanks to everyone who either has given us their perspective or is about to 🙂

New discussion group BiTalkia! Please help by filling in survey about dates etc.

by unchartedworlds

As some people know, plans are brewing for a new bi discussion group for Nottingham.

(When we say “bi”, we mean it in a fairly umbrella-ish sense of the word, not being picky about labels.  We’ll welcome people who are in a questioning stage about their sexuality as well.)

It’s kind of a spin-off from BiTopia’s pub meetups, for those of us who’d like a more socially-structured space, and we’re calling it BiTalkia.

We’re hoping to run the first one in January or February 2015.  It will be in a wheelchair-accessible venue somewhere in Nottingham City, on a weekday evening…

but which venue and which evening, and what time?  and what discussion themes?

Ha, well, that is exactly what we now need to work out 🙂

If you are a bit bi in some sense, and you want to egg us on, please fill in our spangly new survey!!

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/JBYW3LS

(Time predictions for filling it in:
Quickly clicking on buttons & boxes, inc looking in your diary at the possible dates, about 10 mins.
If adding optional comments to help us think things through, maybe more like 20 or 30 mins.
Emails to me with your ideas are also welcome:  jennifer at uncharted hyphen worlds dot org.)

Spreading the word

If you’d like to help by spreading the word, you could send people either here, or direct to the survey.

Twitter:  I’ve done a tweet about the survey, which you could retweet – or of course just do a tweet about it yourself, whichever.

Facebook:  BiTopia Facebook is here, and I expect there will be a post coming up there soon about this survey (when Hannah gets time to do it – I try to ignore Facebook myself ;-/ )